Swinger Pet Peeve

Swingers are people… obviously.  Being people, that means Swingers are just as likely to exhibit behaviors that others find disconcerting. One of our biggest pet peeves are the notorious Lifestyle “Time Wasters”. If you’ve been on a Swinger site before you have probably read in at least one online profile “No Time Wasters” that is how much of a problem they can be.

What is a Time Waster? They are the type that send endless emails back & forth often very flattering or asking numerous questions. They will will often suggest getting together in a somewhat vague way but there will almost never be concrete plans. When there are plans, that’s when they show their true-colors. A true Time Waster that makes plans will almost always have “something come up” and they will have to cancel. That’s if you are lucky, the worst type won’t even cancel, they will just sort of go dark when it comes to communication and just not show up.


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Even couples that have been Swinging as long as we have are not immune to Time Wasters. Case in point, a friend of ours said they wanted to have a house party to celebrate my Hubby’s birthday coming up. The last we had heard from them was 2 weeks ago she said she was off of work the next day and she was going to send out invites. This weekend we messaged her asking how the invites were going. Her response, they decided not to do the party because something came up. We kind of knew this was a possibility with them, the Wife of the couple tends to talk about big plans with us but in all the years we have known them she has yet to follow through. When we do get together with them it is because we made the plans or invited them over to our house.


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When it was suggested it would have been nice if they had let us know they are cancelling the birthday party, her reply was, “we didn’t think you would notice.”  😮


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Wow!  They know we have a young child, they know we had to get a sitter for the night.  Hell, their kid has sat for us before and yet that never even occurred to her.

So, we cancelled the sitter and messaged her, “We cancelled the sitter. Next time please let us know when you are cancelling.” Of course, we don’t plan on letting there be a next time with them. Lesson learned… again.

Swinger Comedy?

A few weeks ago a friend of ours won 20 tickets to a comedy club to see a show.  A few of us ended up going to see 4 comedians with 3 being local stand-ups & one being “a national headliner and former finalist on Last Comic Standing.” We had great expectations.  The locals were hilarious, the headliner was a snooze.

Anyway, my limited understanding is most comedy is funny because people can relate personally to the situations in the jokes. However… Swinger comedy, MOST people will not relate personally to Swinging but we all got to talking about how some of the situational experiences of Swingers can be quite funny even to the non-Swingers.

Here are some examples of what I thought would be hilarious even if most people could not directly relate to them:


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  • Ladies, ever been finger-banged by another chick with really long nails? Your ass-cheeks learn to walk backwards on their own.
  • That moment when in an orgy the guy you are fucking starts negotiating where he wants to cum on you. “Can I cum on your face?”
    “No.”
    “How about on your tits?”
    “Tits are good, but if I see you aiming anywhere higher nothing will be coming out of your balls for weeks.”
  • You have to pull a heavy, girthy cock out of your mouth to ask, “What is your name again?”
  • You say to one guy, “Wrong hole! Wrong hole!” Then to the less-endowed of the two guys, “Ok, now that he’s in YOU can put YOURS in my ass.”

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I don’t know.  Maybe my act needs some work.


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Swing Out Socials GLOW PARTY at The Korral

So, you may or may not know that Hubby & I run our own Swingers’ group & host Swingers’ events for our group called Swing!.  Being that we are almost always the ones running the events or parties we frequently don’t get much of a chance to play when we go to a Swingers’ Club event.  We are hoping to change that this weekend.  😜

I had noticed a couple weeks ago that we had gotten invites to the Glow Party being hosted by our friends at Swing Out Socials (SOS) in Pennsylvania at one of our favorite Swingers’ clubs, The Korral. Hubby said we should definitely go and try to have some naughty fun.  I arranged a sitter for us & tomorrow we are heading out to our first Glow Party.  Yes, you heard that right, we have NEVER been to a Glow Party before. We’ve been checking all of the usual lifestyle sites we are on (SwingLifestyle, Kasidie, LoveVoodooAltPlayground, Quiver, SwingTowns) & this SOS event is already looking like it is going to be CRAZY.  Combined with all of the sites & SOS’s Facebook group, there are easily 250-300 people signed up to attend.

We’ve got the sitter arranged, we bought our UV reactive & glowing clothes & accessories… We are ready to get our Glow & Swing on!


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Ugh!

So I migrated to a new URL for Swing! Muses because I didn’t want the goofy “wordpress” thing on there. I just wanted it to be SwingMuses.com.  Of course, none of the customizations we made transferred and for some reason we can’t remember where we made them.  Hubby & I tried for hours to track it down.  So, at least for a while, all the text except for in posts will be blue or gray.

😕


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“Valentine’s Day” Gift…

Liberator Heart Wedge®

Liberator Heart Wedge®

I told Hubby I wanted to try out a Liberator Wedge and directed him to Better Sex by Sinclair Institute.  He sent me a few options. He and I agreed that the Liberator Heart Wedge looked like the best place to start.  He said the Heart Wedge seemed the most fitting because it can be a Valentine’s Day gift for both of us too.  💕  LOL

Hubby being Hubby, he shopped around for the best deal he could find.  Usually Liberator products have a maximum 10% discount allowed, but Hubby found a link that took $20 off a $60 purchase.  He said he got the normally $69.95 Heart Wedge for $49.95 AND free shipping with his link:  BetterSex take $20 off $60 or more

I am very excited to try it out and write a review about it.  Maybe I can convince him to let me have it early so I can let him have it early.  😜


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Product Review: Astroglide Spark

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Astroglide Spark

So we got our “hands” on some Astroglide Spark and I believe we have a new favorite lube! Hubby & I tried Spark for the first time last night & we loved it. As a couple that is involved in the Swinger Lifestyle and runs a Swingers’ group, you start to learn what does & doesn’t work for you when it comes to lubrication. Spark fills all the needs quite nicely; it has a natural feel like a water-based lube, but it is long lasting like a silicone lube as well.

So, we decided to try Spark last night like we were newbies that have never used lube before. Instead of a lot of foreplay to get the natural lubricants flowing, Hubby lubed us both up with Spark & went straight to work. Wow! There was no initial friction or tackiness until the lube warmed up like there can be with other freshly applied lubricants; everything was ready to go right out of the gate. Sex for us tends to last into what many people would consider pretty long sessions. An hour is short with 2-3 hours not being unusual. There was no breakdown of Spark after over an hour of play, we never had to reapply at all.

We can easily see Spark becoming our “go to” lube for one-on-one play, anal play AND in a group play situation. Clearly Spark has nailed the formula to last for long sessions of smooth play without having to worry about needing to reapply. We still haven’t tried Spark in a multiple partner situation or with toys yet but we are expecting great things from Spark.


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Periods suck!

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We’ve had a Swinger date night planned with one of our favorite couples for tonight for weeks. Guess who just got her period. 😭